For example, the US Department of Education, Office of Civil Rights, is interested in the experiences of students who are protected by the Civil Rights Act which outlaws discrimination based on race, color, religion, sex, national origin, sexual orientation and gender identity.

If you are part of a protected community, I am collecting statements for the OCR about ways in which you do not feel safe on BYU’s campus. I realize that many folks have been able to avoid interacting with the HCO, the Title IX office, or the BYU Police, but still feel unsafe on campus or in campus housing. If this is you, you deserve to be protected and feel safe in pursuing your education at BYU.

If you’d like to submit an experience, please do that here.

Also, please share this form with anyone you know who should have been protected and made to feel safe so we can gather more information. I promise to keep your identity secret, unless you consent to sharing that information. I will always check with you first.

PS Under Title VII, minorities who are employees, faculty, and staff should also be protected from workplace harassment. If you have an experience to share, please feel free to contribute.

Kevin was a nice guy and didn’t seem judgmental or looking to punish me but it was the most terrifying time of my life. I had a girlfriend and we were reported because she had slept over at my out out in the living room a couple times. Which he said was against the law of chastity even though it was only stated in the rules that the opposite sex can’t sleep over.

Anyway, I was asked to write a paper explaining my testimony or something. Something to prove that I wasn’t gay or that I regretted it or something. I didn’t admit I was gay or that I was seeing someone. Then he told me that over the weekend they would decide what to do with me.

Definitely the worst weekend of my life.

I got academic probation, no suspension or anything thank heaven.

Kevin was nice and seemed understanding and all that good stuff. He asked if I would sign a form to contact my bishop. I didn’t sign it. He told me I had to do 10 hours of community service for the next 6 months as well as have regular meetings with my bishop that the bishop and I could decide together.

We met monthly where I would report on all the things I was supposed to do and we talked about how I was applying for the advertising program. I told him the good news when I got in.

At the end I had to write a paper “recommitting to the honor code”. I wrote that I didn’t want to jeopardize my education so I would consider that next time I was tempted. And then I was all done.

Definitely not the worst experience. But the fact that I had to be put on probation for a sleepover is just wild.

I attended the honor code protests when they happened. I’m graduated now but my S/O is still at school.

Click here to add your experience.

At the same time, I met with the Title IX office at BYU and it was HORRIFIC. I asked for a female to talk to, but they made me speak with a male (you know, the same gender that assaulted me).

The Title IX officer was dismissive at best. He straight up told me there was nothing they could do, even though my assailant was still a student. Total BS.

Click here to add your experience.

I came to BYU happy to be away from my abusive family. I lived in Heritage Halls, barely 19 and very naïve. I knew I was gay, but I was not out to anyone except my Heritage YSA Ward’s Bishop and two close friends from home.

I was trying my best to find girls to be friends with and to go on casual dates with in hopes one might want to marry someone like me some day. I was filling out mission papers. I was a trying to be a model student and model church member.

I was also suicidal.

I made a friend in my Writing 150 class and we would talk every day. He lived in the same building as me and would invite me over to parties with his friends. We got close enough for me to feel comfortable coming out to him.

He didn’t care I about my sexuality especially since I was looking for a wife. We would also talk about mental health. I told him I was depressed and left it there. His girlfriend had depression and had been suicidal most of their relationship, so he knew what that looked like.

I had made a plan to end my life and the night before I texted most of my friends some type of “I love you, you mean so much to me,” text. My friend from Writing 150 knew what that meant and called his floor’s RA. He told his RA about my situation — including my sexuality and my depression. It was about 3:00am and his RA could not get a hold of me, so they called campus police for a “wellness” check.

The police brought my friend to my door asking him to text me and knock while they hid out of sight. This was their way of getting me out of the apartment I lived in. I had no idea any of this was going on. I thought my friend just wanted to talk. Once I was out of the door, my friend said, “I’m sorry,” and an officer grabbed my shoulder and pretty forcefully marched me down the hall to the multi-purpose room.

To say I was shocked is an understatement. There were about three or four other officers in the room. One had a CAPS counselor on his phone and we spoke about suicide and what it means for other people.

I was in absolute panic and just responded to the questions he asked me, trying to appease him and get out of the situation. I told him I had no plan to end my life and he believed me. The officers just stared at me while I spoke to the counselor.

After the call ended, the campus police asked if I wanted them to call my family. I started frantically crying at that point and they all just stared at me. I really don’t remember how this encounter ended, but I got back to my room and woke up the next day too numb to move.

My friend and those campus officers saved my life, so I do feel some type of gratitude, but as I have gotten healthier and more aware of the world I realize how botched and unhelpful that whole experience was.

Everything was so gruff and harsh. I felt like I would be arrested if I answered a question wrong. I hope these were people who normally do not respond to what they call “wellness checks” because they pretty clearly did not know what they were doing with someone in my mental state.

Three days later, the building advisor (my RA’s boss) sent me an email saying that he wanted to meet with me just to talk about what happened and to make sure I am ok now. My friend’s RA had told my RA that I am gay and suicidal. He also told this building advisor who told higher management.

I declined to meet with the building advisor stating I had already spoken to my RA, and he said he had to talk to me, too. It was protocol.

When I went down to meet him, he escorted me to the main Heritage building and to the office of the woman in charge of Heritage Halls.

He did not talk to me about what happened. This was not about my safety. It was another deception.

This woman had my housing contract on her desk. She never asked my name, where I was from, or how I was feeling. She started by telling me how I did something very wrong.

She informed me that talking about suicidal ideation to other students living in on-campus housing was an infringement of my behavioral contract and told me I should feel bad for ruining my friend’s freshman experience.

I was supposed to reach out to my RA, my bishop, or my professors. These people I barely knew are who BYU provides for us to “confide this awful stuff in, not your little friends.”

She called me selfish. I was still numb from everything happening a few days before and just nodded and agreed. I apologized. She had me sign a form stating I was aware of my behavioral infringement and that if I broke the contract again Housing could choose to evict me from my apartment.

I spent the rest of that school year too nervous to talk to anyone about what was going on in my head. I had a therapist at CAPS who offered some good advice and coping mechanisms. But when I told him everything going on in my life, he broke down in tears and said he did not know how to help me.

I am lucky to have met the few random people I have in Provo. They have lifted me up and encouraged me to get healthier.

I have a great therapist now and am learning how to enjoy the life I have. I do mourn for people like me who don’t have the support I do. I know without it I would not be alive.

Click here to add your experience.

I consented, they reported it, and I was called into the HCO. There were 3 people there. 2 from the HCO and 1 representative from Title IX office. Even though this was reported to Title IX, it was being handled by the HCO.

I recounted the 2 experiences and the 3 people there came to the conclusion that the student would no longer be able to attend any TA hours or use the computer labs for CS students (so I wouldn’t run into them).

A couple days later, they got the offending student’s recount of events, and then the HCO sent me another email amending their decision, saying that the student was allowed to be on the computer labs and attend TA hours, just not ask help from me or talk to me because I “worked too many hours and would be disadvantageous to the student to not have access to the computer lab or TA help.”

Click here to add your experience.

Here is what I found on the BYU.edu Title IX page, where I discovered that the advocate link in the screenshot does not go to the Title IX Coordinator or even the Title IX office.

I checked Utah Valley University, Mountainland Technical College, Utah State University, Western Governor’s University, Oregon State University, Pepperdine University, Northwest Nazarene University, University of Utah, and Westminster College.

Note: An interesting thing to research would be how many clicks away from the home page is the Title IX page, as well as how comprehensive and immediately accessible the content is, as well as how easy it is to find the contact information for the Title IX Coordinator. #inmyfreetime

In my search, I decided to look at other CES Schools.

BYU-Idaho:

BYU-Hawaii:

Ensign College:

Also, it is interesting to me that the BYU Survivor Advocate webpage doesn’t directly link to the Title IX Office except for in a small footer menu.

Note: All of these photos are current as of May 18, 2021. If you find the pages are different from what is here, please submit the links to the updated pages and I’ll upload new screenshots.

It’s all just weird, right?

The last time I was there, a student reported an event that occurred without their consent and the HCO counselor stopped the meeting and said the matter was now a Title IX issue, which was absolutely the right thing to do.

This counselor then told the student that if they had a kid in their shoes, they would first report to a BYU employee called a “Survivor Advocate” because the SA was required to maintain 100% confidentiality, implying that the Title IX office would not. It was also implied that the Title IX process is difficult and complicated, and the SA was much less formal. We were told that the SA can often resolve issues without the involvement of the Title IX office at all.

I asked this counselor is the SA was part of the Title IX office, and was told it was “more of an extension” of the Title IX office. The counselor then pulled up bios of the two SAs on campus and made sure to reiterate that they were the better choice for this situation.

This raises several questions for me.

1. Below is a screenshot of the BYU Title IX webpage:

The first time I looked at this page, I assumed the “Contact an Advocate” button would connect me to the Title IX official (I later learned this position is called the Title IX Coordinator), when instead, it connects to the Survivor Advocate. Why does it feel like the SA, a BYU employee, is given equal representation as the Title IX Coordinator, who has a mandate from the federal government to protect students from discrimination and sexual violence?

I researched other private religious universities as well as other Utah universities and found that none of them have “Survivor Advocates.” Other universities have their Title IX Coordinator and reporting process listed clearly.

2. So, why are BYU students being redirected to the SA? What is the reason that students are encouraged to avoid the Title IX office? The easiest explanation for me is that BYU has found a way to artificially lower crime statistics reported under the Clery Act.

3. Why is the Title IX office investigating reports of sexual misconduct? As I understand it, they investigate claims of discrimination and sexual violence that are brought to them by students. The Honor Code defines sexual misconduct for the students, right? Why is the Title IX office acting as an investigative arm of the HCO?

4. In communication with the HCO, why are students required to have a secure login to view complaints against them, but the Title IX Coordinator can email students directly with the same content, creating opportunity for private matters to be made public?

5. Furthermore, why does the Title IX Coordinator email the student and also suggest the student speak to a SA? There are other resources available, but the SA is the only one mentioned directly by both the HCO and the Title IX office.

6. Every time I go with a student to the HCO, or I speak with anyone on campus on behalf of a student, I am thanked for being there, for advocating for a student. Isn’t that your job?

Gender Discrimination is defined as the following by Title IX:

• Gender discrimination is defined as the following by Title IX:
• Discrimination or harassment based upon one’s gender (sex)
• Unfair treatment, attitudes, or behaviors towards an individual based upon their gender (sex)
• Gender identity discrimination as covered by Title VII
• Sexism, sexist attitudes, and sex stereotyping
• Unproportionate athletic programs or activities offered to all genders in relationship to the college’s enrollment

Examples

• gender-based bullying
• derogatory or sexist remarks
• gender discrimination in an activity, athletics, program, office, or classroom

Sexual Harassment

Sexual Harassment is defined as the following by Title IX:

• Unwanted sexual behavior, advances, or requests for favors
• Unwelcomed verbal, visual, or physical sexual conduct
• Offensive, severe, and/or frequent remarks about a person’s sex
• Harassment of a sexual nature which interferes with an individual’s right to an education and participation in a program or activity

Examples

• stalking or obscene phone calls, texts, emails, or gestures
• sexually suggestive jokes, whistles, catcalls, or innuendos
• inappropriate touching
• intimidation

Sex Violence

Sex Violence is defined as the following by Title IX:

• Sexual abuse or assault, battery, or coercion
• Unwanted sexual contact that stops short of rape or completed rape
• Use of force or manipulation of unwanted sexual activity
• Physical acts where a person is incapable of giving consent or is against a person’s will

Examples

• sexual assault, battery, or coercion
• attempted or completed rape
• inappropriate touching
• physical and/or aggressive sexual advances

Retaliation

Retaliation is defined as the following by Title IX:

• A strike back in response to another’s action or accusation
• a form of revenge or reaction because of a filed complaint against a person
• refusal to promote, advance, or accurately support/qualify a person due to a complaint filed

Examples

• demotion or prohibiting advancement due to a filed complaint
• firing, loss of benefits, or the like due to a filed complaint
• unfair treatment or discrimination due to a filed complaint

Hostile Environment

Hostile Environment is defined as the following by Title IX:

• A situation of discriminatory or sexual nature that has occurred and created a adverse setting
• An intimidating or offensive environment that causes a person to be fearful
• A setting that denies, limits, or interferes with a person’s ability to participate in or benefit from a program, activity, or job

Examples

• Bullying, abusive or intimidating comments and actions
• Intimidating or offensive comments that alter the conditions of a person’s work, classroom, team, or program environment
• Continual offensive comments or surroundings of a discriminatory or sexual nature

(read more from Ventura College)